13 Ways Tremors from Parkinson’s Disease Come in Handy

From the "laugh about it or you'll cry" file.  Things have been a little difficult lately.  I had to start a new Parkinson's med this week and the month of May hasn't been the best anyway in many areas of my life.  Sometimes in adversity you find out who truly loves you and has your back.  When lies and rumors are spread by those "friends" you thought you had, you are hurt, but at least you know who to trust.  But God gave me a sense of humor for a reason, one of which is to laugh when I want to cry sometimes.  I found some of these, added others, rewrote others and laughed so hard, so here are 12 Ways PD tremors come in handy.  Enjoy!

1. Rocking your fussy grandchild to sleep. Give Mom and Dad a break. Five minutes with us, and the little booger is out.

2. Freaking out a burglar. Who needs ADT? Put up a yard sign that says “The Owner of This House Has a Shotgun. And Parkinson’s. Good Luck.” Sleep well.

3. Fertilizing the yard. We can sprinkle for acres without tiring. Give us the fertilizer bag, and we’ll see you at lunch.

4. Blow-drying hair. Hairdressers say blow-dryers cause less damage if you move them quickly from side to side, as opposed to holding them steady. ‘Nuf said.

5. Cooking and baking. We can whisk eggs. All. Day. Long. And you need sprinkles on those cookies? Just hand over the jar and walk away. We got this.

6. Feed your fish. Need a little shake of food twice a day? One good tremor twitch and the Goldie twins have got exactly the right amount of dinner.

7. Pet the cat. We can do this for hours without tiring. Seriously, our arms are moving anyway. You may as well stick a cat under there.

8. Tossing tinsel on the Christmas tree. Everybody loves those little silver strands, but nobody likes having to place them onto the tree. Hand those individual strands to your closest Parkinson’s relative. We’ll tremor-toss them all night long, until that tree glows in the dark. Merry Christmas.

9. Channel surfing. But I got to warn you. We’re fast. You may need to be an Evelyn Wood speed reading graduate to keep up, but give us a remote and we’ll show you how it’s done.

10. Italian Food Improvement.  Parmesan cheese makes everything Italian taste better.  Hand over the dispenser and say "when"

11. Camp fires. And I’m not talking about the EZ, light-in-a-pit things with presto logs. I’m talking “Survivor” fires, with no matches.  The ones where somebody has to rub two sticks together, really, really fast, until combustion. Hand over the sticks. We’ll call you when dinner’s ready.

12. Make popcorn. None of that wimpy microwave crap either. The good stuff,  that requires tedious moments of pan shaking on the stovetop. Oh, you want a bowl for a late-night movie? No problem. Just prop us up next to the stove and put those sleep tremors to work. Yeah, we’re that good.

13. Craft projects. See “Cooking and baking.” Only with glitter.