Sunday, August 9, 2015
5 Lessons I Hope My Children Learned from Me
I started a couple of weeks ago sharing from a journal I found from “Dean Fig’s Court,” a time at church camp in which we let our campers ask any questions. This week, I share from K.M. who asked, “Other than ‘church stuff’ (like God and church and stuff) what are the 5 best pieces of advice you’ve given you kids and would you give them to us?”
Of course my answer began as with “The God and STUFF is the by far the most important!” But this is what I wrote down that night that I told them and I thought I might share with you tonight before I go to bed.
1, Be sure to tell those you love that you love them. I do that daily if possible. I don’t want to leave this world with someone pondering if I loved them or not. There is no more important emotion than love, let others know.
2. Respect everyone. Regardless of how others treat you, respect them. Respect their choices, respect their decisions, respect their beliefs. This doesn’t mean you have to agree with them or condone their actions, but it is their right to live their life the way they so choose.
3 In all things, show grace, mercy and forgiveness. This is possibly the most difficult part of life, but also one of the most necessary. It matters not how someone treats you. It matters not what they say about you or what they do to you, take the high road in all situations with love, grace, forgiveness and mercy given to you by your Lord. We don’t deserve it from Him and many times others don’t deserve it from us, but God gives it anyway and so should we.
4. Be you in all situations. Don’t change who you are for a boy or girl. Don’t let anyone or any situation define who you are. You are a child of the King and what He thinks is all that matters. Don’t change your dress, your desires or your dreams because of anyone else. Be you.
5. No matter what you do in life, there are choices. And with those choices can come rewards or consequences. Don’t let anybody steal your thunder, but don’t let anybody take the blame either. Own up to your mistakes, learn from them and move on with life. Never hang your head, even in defeat. Don’t brag when you win. Do your best and win or lose, give God glory and don’t give a rip about what others say about it.
I hope my kids have learned these lessons. These may not be on your top 5 list (other than all that God stuff) but I think they are the best advice I could give my kids both blood born and otherwise. God bless each of you this Lord’s day.
Wednesday, August 5, 2015
Church Killers: Tradition and ByLaws
Admittedly this post is more for my friends who are minsters or in church leadership, but it is also important for any member of a congregation.
Over the years I have spent time talking to those in church leadership and invariably the conversion has turned to factors that harm the church. There are several, many to mention really, but 2 topics usually come up! Tradition and ByLaws. You read that correctly.
How many of you have heard the phrase "We've never done it that way before!"? A word of advice. When you hear those words.....RUN!!! Because you are about to embark on a conversation that will not only lack rationale, but any Biblical content whatsoever, unless you want to count Great Grandpa 3:12 as scripture. Traditions slowly become Holy and can't be touched. Whether it be when communion comes in the service, songs that must be sung and those that can't be, preaching attire, the KJV, coffee in the sanctuary, whether the toiler paper hangs over or under, and the list goes on and on! When tradition takes over, common sense and scripture often go out the door.
I think the best question we can ask ourselves, whether in ministry, leadership or sitting in the pews, is why do we do this? Many of the things we do in church has a very Biblical reason, but some things are simply a tradition. I am not saying tradition has no room in our churches. Some of them are awesome! But to do something just because "we've always done it that way" is, quite frankly, a very silly reason to do anything.
Another rather tickling situation in our churches are the By Laws. Did you even know your church has them? Odds are they do because of the civil responsibilities of being incorporated and non profit status. Many of them are locked away in a box under the basement steps guarded by a rat or a snake to keep anyone from reading them. Ask for a copy and be prepared to be stared at like you have 3 heads or you just asked for the Presidential Secret Book.
The By Laws are quoted, referred to, alluded to by leadership on occasion. But it usually depends on who you ask as to what the By Laws say. You have a better chance getting struck by lightning than getting a straight answer on a By Law question. Much like tradition, I urge you to get a copy of the By Laws, don't take someone's word about what they say. Read them and asked the same question you asked about traditions. Why is this in here? Why can't we have certain groups sing here? Why can't a group have a yard sale in the parking lot? Why are the elders elected for lifetime? Why aren't there any women on the pulpit committee? They have to listen to sermons too.
I have actually heard an elder say, "We don't follow the By Laws anyway." Why? Why have them if you don't follow them? But they do come in handy when leadership needs a reason to say "You can't do that." But when the By Laws say something the leadership doesn't want to do, those pesky things are just in the way.
Be aware my friends. Traditions and By Laws can kill ya if you aren't careful!!
Over the years I have spent time talking to those in church leadership and invariably the conversion has turned to factors that harm the church. There are several, many to mention really, but 2 topics usually come up! Tradition and ByLaws. You read that correctly.
How many of you have heard the phrase "We've never done it that way before!"? A word of advice. When you hear those words.....RUN!!! Because you are about to embark on a conversation that will not only lack rationale, but any Biblical content whatsoever, unless you want to count Great Grandpa 3:12 as scripture. Traditions slowly become Holy and can't be touched. Whether it be when communion comes in the service, songs that must be sung and those that can't be, preaching attire, the KJV, coffee in the sanctuary, whether the toiler paper hangs over or under, and the list goes on and on! When tradition takes over, common sense and scripture often go out the door.
I think the best question we can ask ourselves, whether in ministry, leadership or sitting in the pews, is why do we do this? Many of the things we do in church has a very Biblical reason, but some things are simply a tradition. I am not saying tradition has no room in our churches. Some of them are awesome! But to do something just because "we've always done it that way" is, quite frankly, a very silly reason to do anything.
Another rather tickling situation in our churches are the By Laws. Did you even know your church has them? Odds are they do because of the civil responsibilities of being incorporated and non profit status. Many of them are locked away in a box under the basement steps guarded by a rat or a snake to keep anyone from reading them. Ask for a copy and be prepared to be stared at like you have 3 heads or you just asked for the Presidential Secret Book.
The By Laws are quoted, referred to, alluded to by leadership on occasion. But it usually depends on who you ask as to what the By Laws say. You have a better chance getting struck by lightning than getting a straight answer on a By Law question. Much like tradition, I urge you to get a copy of the By Laws, don't take someone's word about what they say. Read them and asked the same question you asked about traditions. Why is this in here? Why can't we have certain groups sing here? Why can't a group have a yard sale in the parking lot? Why are the elders elected for lifetime? Why aren't there any women on the pulpit committee? They have to listen to sermons too.
I have actually heard an elder say, "We don't follow the By Laws anyway." Why? Why have them if you don't follow them? But they do come in handy when leadership needs a reason to say "You can't do that." But when the By Laws say something the leadership doesn't want to do, those pesky things are just in the way.
Be aware my friends. Traditions and By Laws can kill ya if you aren't careful!!
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